(written on butterfly paper)
My Dear Friend,
Words can not express my feelings as I read the email about the passing of your step mom. I am glad that you had the opportunity to be with your sister and brothers by her bedside when she entered the next phase of her journey. I will continue to uphold all of you in prayer as you grieve your loss.
The process of saying goodbye to a loved one is never easy, no matter what the circumstances. I know that when my dad passed in May 2012, the conflicting emotions swirled around as to the sorrow of losing him, the gladness that his suffering was over, the regrets of the "could have", "should have" and "wish I would have" left me with overwhelming emotion. Although the pain does lessen over time, the "missing" of my dad still remains.
Through it all, you have your wonderful sister and brothers to support each other and love each other. Whatever you do, do not withdraw, but continue to reach out to each other and be determined to strengthen your family bond. Never wait for them to call you because they may be going through something and need to hear the sound of your voice as their big sister.
As you know, my faith in God is strong but it's not perfect. Faith is a journey. You are not expected to be perfect about it and not question or seek answers. I often question God as to why certain things happen. Sometimes I get angry or hurt. One thing I want to encourage you to do is to be yourself as you seek God and trying to strengthen your faith. You do not have to take the same path that others have taken. You do not have to conform to the man made rules that people have put into place.
All that you have to do is come as you are and God will meet you there and love you for you. You are made as God has intended and He loves you for you. You don't have to change or be anything that you are not; just be you!
Life is full of so many questions and a lot of things happen that we don't understand. The one thing I know is that God is with us on this journey because he is within us.We all carry God within us and we are all connected to each other, whether we realize it or not. Each of us is carrying a part of the other; you are a part of me as much as I am a part of you and we are connected to everyone else in this world. Our souls are entwined and comingled throughout eternity.
Because of this, our oneness ensures that we are never alone. Because of this, our loved ones never truly leave us when they pass on to the next phase of their soul's journey. They remain with us and bring us along for the ride. To me, that is the beauty of our connected spirits- past, present and future.
I believe that we each have a purpose and a calling during this lifetime. I know that there is a life for my soul after my physical death and I know that you do too. I encourage you not to dwell so much on the inevitable death of our bodies but to embrace life and live fearlessly and passionately. Everything that happens is a part of the bigger picture of what God has designed. We can't dwell on it and we may never understand it during our lifetime.
We all stumble through this life together and seek to understand why things happen. They just do. We only get one lifetime that we know of. Our job is to live, love, learn, forgive, enjoy, show compassion and help each other along the way. Life is, or should I say, this life is only a small part of our existence. Really live your life and don't take anything for granted.
I wrote this letter on butterfly stationary for a reason. I believe that your step mom has emerged from her cocoon (her physical body) with all of her life experiences. Because of all of these life experiences, even her cancer, she has been transformed (her spirit) into the most beautiful form of herself- her butterfly. I hope that you find comfort in knowing this.
With Love! S
(copyright SD Wolff 2013)
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